What to Dwell On Instead of Worrying

I looking through Scripture in order to attempt to encourage a friend, this translation of one of my favorite passages really spoke to my heart. Funny how that happens!!

^4-5Celebrate God all day, every day. I mean, revel in him! Make it as clear as you can to all you meet that you're on their side, working with them and not against them. Help them see that the Master is about to arrive. He could show up any minute!

^6-7Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

^8-9Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies. (Philippians 4:4-9, TheMessage)

The Mystery Book

I was VERY hesitant to share some of my struggle about not being able to get pregnant with my blogging community. One is because it is heartbreaking and difficult for me. Two, because it is soo personal and isloating in nature... something I can easily "hide" from neighbors and friends... even more so online. And because with sharing my heart, I was opening up myself for critism (on many levels).

Last week, that last hesitation was taken away. I was blessed to feel the care and concern from two friends. I received 2 books in the mail to help me through some of emotional struggles concerning not being pregnant. The funny thing was that they sent me the same book:) One was sent by a sweet local friend and then other was sent by a sweet "mystery" person. In both cases, I am very thankful for the thought and love you have shown me.

While I was taken back by the title "In Conceivable: Finding Peace in the Midst of Infertility".... just because I'm not in that place yet. I've had a year of not conceiving, but I've yet gotten into any medical procedures or diagnoses that the author, Shannon Woodward, experienced!! Still I was drawn to the book for a couple of reasons. I WANT peace through the disappointment of not being pregnant month after month! Two, because the book is written from her experience and what she struggled with and learned... biographies are my favorite types of books! And I felt a connection with her since she is also a pastor's wife.

I feel like I am just comsuming the book. The first night reading it I could relate to sooo many of the desires, frustrations and mental "plans" that Shannon went through! In some ways it was nice to know that I am very normal.

The experiences of the author are very different from my own. And I am no were close to being finished the book. I do look forward though to how she is able to "find peace" and have a quiet spirit while "waiting".

From the book I again saw that I am a very blessed Momma. I can desire a bigger family and for my womb to one day hold another little baby, but when I open my eyes to the blessings I have been given... I see 3 sweet children who want to climb into my lap, have me play a game with them or watch them zoom their bikes around the yard.

This is a new goal, to be able to say and feel like this:

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:11-13 (New International Version)


Thank you for your prayers and concern. And thank you for the books! One (or both eventually) will be passed to someone else who maybe struggling in this area!!! And if you want to reveal yourselves that is fine!

A glimpse of Spring

Just last week we were playing in snow:) Now this week we are running around in T-shirts and wind-breakers:) When I first moved to this area, my neighbors told me, "if you don't like the weather, wait a few days!" And after 4.5 years I understand how often the weather changes!

We had a little "surprise" in the back "garden" this afternoon.... bulbs I had planted 2 falls ago had started to poke through the brown dead leaves and pine needles:)

I little bit of green in our brown winter garden... a glimpse of spring!!


Not that I want to "wish away" the next few months... but I LOVE the new green of spring, the beautiful flowers and warmer weather!!

I know this passage is in the conversation of not worrying... but it reminds of the beauty of the spring flowers:)

Matt 6:28b,29 -"Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing,yet Solomon[one of the wisest and most wealthiest kings of Isreal] in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are."

We enjoyed looking at the little crocus shoots coming through and it will be fun for the kids to "check on" the little plants and wait with anticipation for their blooms:)And see one little beautiful piece of God's creation this spring!!!

Long Awaited Child

Every year I seem to gravitate to one piece or person of the Christmas story. The year before last I was VERY pregnant with Lydia and I remember thinking over and over how challenging the trip to Bethlehem must have been for Mary. Mary would have been VERY, VERY pregnant with Jesus to have given birth so soon after their arrival in Bethlehem. Just the aches and pains would have made the 100 mile trip on foot or donkey very uncomfortable! But Old Testament Scripture was fulfilled....


This year has been a little different for me. For many months now we have been hoping to get pregnant and expand our little family (my husband has been praying for twins for years....LOL.. seriously!!!). But month after month, we've been disappointed.


I know people and have read plenty of stories about couples that deal with inferility for years so I don't want to make light of their years of disappointment. But we've never had this before. We had a very few months of waiting when we got pregnant with both Anna and Christopher. And Lydia was our "surprise" baby... we found out we were pregnant with her while Christopher was 5 months old; he was not even sitting up yet!!



So this is new for us.



While practicing for the Christmas Canata, I was listening and singing the classic hymn Come, Thou Long-Expected Jesus!! At first I just sang along, but then my mind started to mull over the words and my heart started to connect to the Isrealities.


For over 400 years the Isrealities had been expected a "Savior", a promised Messiah, to "set Thy people free"!!! 400 YEARS!!! Isreal had been waiting and watching. Looking for signs of His coming. Looking for a great and mighty leader that would deliver them and establish an amazing kingdom.....



And then came little, baby Jesus. Not quite what they were expecting. But after many, many generations and years..... the Long-Expected Savior came! Here are the words to the hymn:

Come, Thou Long-Expected Jesus, Born to set Thy people free:

From our fears and sins release us; Let us find our rest in Thee.

Isreal's strength and consolation, Hope of all the earth Thou art;

Dear desire of every nation, Joy of every longing heart.

Born Thy people to deliver, born a child, and yet a King,

Born to reign in us forever, Now Thy gracious kingdom bring,

By Thine own eternal spirit Rule in all our hearts alone;

By Thine all-sufficient merit, Raise us to Thy glorious throne.

While I would be overjoyed to find out I am expecting. I've realized that everything happens in God's time. So for this time of waiting I need to be faithful to what and who He has already called me to do. I need to be dilligently serving when and where I can and enjoying this special time of just having toddlers/preschoolers.



And while I am NOT pregnant I also have the opportunity to serve my little sister who is. I keep thinking that I'll be a better help to her if I'm not VERY large with pregnancy, too!!

Here is little Lydia pointing to the "baby" in Aunt Jaclyn's tummy today. She just loved showing us where the baby was:) Soo cute!!!


My prayer is that I'll be found faithful in the weeks, months and possibly years that we might have to wait for another child. That I would have a peaceful and quiet heart before the Lord concerning this as I wait; knowing that it's in God's hands. And that I would always be thankful for the 4 blessings that I already have to care for, love and encourage in their relationship (and future relationships) with the Lord.